As befits the world's worst gift-giver, I did not have a Mother's Day present when Melina woke to Matilda's breakfast preparations on Sunday morning. It's not that I hadn't tried. It's not that I didn't have an opportunity. We'd spent hours on Saturday in stores looking at clothing and things. I'd been sent on an errand to one of the largest malls in the nordic countries Friday after work. I'd even bought a card on that occasion. But when it came to pulling the trigger and buying something, I couldn't.

I went to sleep Saturday night thinking a plant from the flower shop across the street would do. But since it wasn't present immediately, I was emptyhanded as Matilda brought out her card and school-made hand-painted baby-food-jar tea-candle lantern. Given my history of gift-giving failure, it didn't look good.

A word of advice to all fathers out there: Don't appeal to the tyranny of expectations created by this artificial day, which benefits only retailers, etc. It never goes down well.

Truthfully, I've never liked "having to buy" a gift. Sometimes it's a good excuse to get something you've thought about getting, but need an excuse. These holidays give children exciting dates to look forward to, and I like the expectation Matilda displays counting down days until a birthday, name day, Christmas, etc... But if Melina wasn't such a good gift giver, I'd louse up the kids presents, too. Matilda is just as eager to give her school made gifts. I wish I could create something on demand to give as a gift.

The best gift Melina has given me was a set of beautiful blue ink bookplates she drew, basing them on some Chinese drawings. They are amazing. They are packed with our young and artistic dreams then...

Later that afternoon (one potted plant richer), we set off for Sipoo, the Talvitie clan's stomping grounds. The weather verged on hot, the trees are green, and we ate outside Herman and Daniela's (Melina's brother and his wife) home. The kids ran wild in the country air. I finished the Schrödinger's Cat trilogy by Robert Anton Wilson.

In all, it was one of the least stressful family gatherings I can recall.